Live Life on Your Own Terms

So many of us give our power away for others to determine the “what we should or shouldn’t be doing, who to let into our lives, when it is the right time, deciding our why for us, where to go or not to go and how to do things the way they expect of us”, of our lives.  This may occur by choice consciously, on a subconscious level or because we feel forced into it. 

Who’s in the Driver’s Seat of Your Life?

I have experienced all three with various people and circumstances depending on what stage of life I was in.  I have come to realize now that due to my lack of self-esteem and self-confidence for many years it was easier to just let someone else be in the driver’s seat of my life.  I rode along shotgun and of course, like all co-pilots had my moments when I spoke up to give direction but still was just going along for the ride for the most part.  

I even let my high school counselor influence my career choice. I ended up questioning my passion, changed majors several times and am now finally pursuing a career in helping people, particularly teenagers, like I had wanted to do all those years ago. If I had been living life on my own terms, who knows how many lives I may have been able to impact along the way. 

Make Your Own Decisions

I choose not to live with regrets but instead live to empower others so that they have the self-esteem and self-confidence I was lacking to equip them to live life on their own terms. I now guide people to have the resources to embrace making decisions for themselves and how to handle it when it’s time to change course.   

Like most, I was raised to do as I was told, don’t step out of line, go along with the plan, measure up and heaven forbid don’t think for yourself.  Encouraging kids to explore who they are as individuals while growing up goes against the grain and is very uncomfortable for a lot of parents.  So when we become adults and are expected to go out and tackle the world, trying to do so on our own terms can cause all kinds of stress and anxiety.  Unfortunately, when we live with our power in someone else’s hands, the moments we do choose to regain control are often met with conflict and heated emotion on both ends.

Fear of Empowerment

I totally understand that seeking to feel empowered rather than be powerless sounds amazing but living life on our own terms can be scary.  We are taught that making mistakes is a bad thing but when you shift your mindset to realize that those mistakes are just opportunities to understand ourselves better so that we can adjust the direction we are going when need be.  When you are driving and miss a turn or realize you are heading in the wrong direction, you simply course correct and get back on track to where you are choosing to go at the time.  We don’t beat ourselves up and knock down who we are as a person or let others make us feel like a failure.  

Learning to rely on your personal Strengths order coupled with building a stronger emotional intelligence, being encouraged to explore alternative options and solutions and having an unbiased mentor to guide you, will provide you with the confidence and motivation needed to set and follow the terms you choose to create for your life.  I have a simple, effective approach that will be tailored specifically for you, your needs and where you are in your life that helps get you on track to where you want to be.